Mark Twain said “An expert is an ordinary fellow from another town.” In which case my trip to Japan certainly qualifies.
I’ve worked in a variety of countries over the years and there’s not much that compares with the ego boost of being invited to another country to share your expertise. My invitation to present at the 12th annual Japan Outdoor Leadership Conference was a highlight of my career – A career I thought ended years ago.
Unbeknownst to me, my college text The Backcountry Classroom, long out of print, is a big hit in Japan… and even China. Copies are hard to find and sometimes fetch over $200. My Japanese host Taito Okamura liked the book so much he named his consulting business Backcountry Classroom Inc.
The ultimate compliment was being asked to autograph copies of my book along with a variety of other items ranging from baseball caps to tote bags. It’s the professional version of your grandchildren thinking you’re perfect. It’s fun to live in a fantasy world for a short while… even if you have to take out the garbage as soon as you get home.
You’d think that with all the wilderness travel I’ve done in various parts of the world that I’m the adventurous type that can’t wait to hop onto a plane and start a new adventure. The reality is considerably different. I love to explore new wildlands but find traveling to new cities stressful. The challenge of finding transportation, communicating in a new language (thank goodness for Google Translate), and meeting new people is all but overwhelming. Fortunately, on my recent trip to Japan I had wonderful people to make my trip as stress free as possible.
My one-week trip was filled with speeches, presentations, and a chance to visit Mount Fuji where I caught the mountain glowing in the rising sun. I got to hike on the mountain and learned that the summer crowds there make the summer crowds here look minuscule in comparison.
There were the crowds of people, public baths, exotic foods, and too many other fascinating things about Japan to count. But I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention one thing – the toilets. That’s right, toilets. Japanese toilets are engineering marvels of the twenty-first century.
Japanese toilets, also called smart or electronic toilets, are advanced bidet-style toilets. At first glance they look like a regular toilet seat, as they should since you can use them like a traditional toilet. However, in addition there’s a touch pad control panel that looks a little less intimidating than the instrument panel of a Gemini space capsule. If you’re adventurous, you’ll start pressing buttons that will give you a whole new bathroom experience. You press one button, and a wand pokes out from the back of the seat and shoots a stream of warm water to the vital area of your bottom. Another button adjusts the pressure. Another provides a shot of hot air to dry you off.
To say I was a bit intimidated the first few times I sat on one of these technological marvels would be an understatement. But I started pressing the array of buttons and it didn’t take me long to get the hang of things.
More advanced toilets open the lid, flush and deodorize automatically. Some have a built-in nightlight and heated seats. I learned the most popular feature is the Toto Otohime (Sound Princess). It can play water noises, bird calls or music, whatever your preference. You can even get seats that massage your bottom. By the end of my stay, I had tried numerous versions and found them all a great improvement over our standard North American Kohler.
They’re clean, hygienic, and do the job incredibly well. I can’t understand why they haven’t become more common in North America. I think they should, and the manufacturers could use the slogan, “Keeping things clean, from the bottom up.”
Clearly I was smitten. Now I just have to convince the rest of my family.
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